With Or Without You
by Kurenai LeStrange
Summary: What happens after a drunken one night stand turns into a life changing event? Who’s life will change while their heart breaks and who’s going to pretend it never happened? Riggins/Street Pairing, Rated: M, MPREG Warning
1. Chapter 1: Memories

With or Without you

_By: Kurenai LeStrange_

_**Friday Night Lights**_

_AU/Mpreg/Angst/Hurt_

_**Tim Riggins/Jason Street**_

_Rated: M_

_Disclaimer: I do not own any rights or properties to this series. I just manipulate the characters for your enjoyment. This is an Mpreg if you don't like it, don't read it. Thx! –Management. LOL._

_*_**What happens after a drunken one night stand turns into a life changing event? Who's life will change while their heart breaks and who's going to pretend it never happened? **

Chapter 1: Memories

***

Tim Riggins looks back on the last seven months with tears in his eyes. He sits in the rocking chair he has placed in the nursery, trying to rest aching feet. Alone. He's been alone most of his life, the memories rush in as quickly as the tears fall out. A whore. Used up and thrown away again and again and he's only 18. The tears fall more quickly, as he sighs looking around the golden rays beaming in through the window, upon the swell of his child. The one and only person whom he can always be there for and will never leave him. Sure the last seven months have been more than difficult, especially when Jason, the love of his life was offered a job he couldn't refuse.

Tim didn't want to hold him back, as he always seemed to do as they were growing up. How could he refuse the only person who had ever loved him and given a damn about him, his dream? Of course being placed on bed rest didn't help, now all he has are his memories and mild contractions. He feels a light one coming on, his ab muscles becoming rigid as a new wave of pain and nausea wash over him for the fifth time in the last few hours. He breathes through it, as the tears fall and the memories continue to torment.

The night he found out about his daughter was the night Jason broke the news about leaving:

(Memory)

_After being seriously ill for the last few weeks, everyone was inquiring as to what was wrong. Tim being who he was knew he could blame it on binge drinking because it was summer, but he knew otherwise. He went into the stop and shop and bought something; he took that something home and prayed before he used it. He had known from a previous experience to take the test due to the fact he hadn't had a drop of alcohol in last two months. It was positive. His heart stops, his world turns black and the next thing he knows he is waking up with the pregnancy test lying in front of him, and his brother slapping cheek,_

"_Tim… Tim… what happened? Are you drunk?"_

_When Tim regained full consciousness he instinctually pushed himself up from the living room hard wood with one arm and wrapping the other one protectively around his midsection, but not without a groan of protest, to a seated position._

"_Billy?"_

"_Yeah, bro. What happened?"_

"_I don't-"_

"_And who'd you knock up?"_

_He asked waving the discarded test in front of him. Within a moment of Billy asking his last question, his baby brother, six foot one and one hundred and eighty-seven pound Tim Riggins burst into tears. Eyes wide in horror as he realized just what that meant, _

"_Oh, Shit. Tim, I'm sorry."_

_He took his baby brother in his arms and let him cry into his collar as he rocked him back and forth for the first time since Tim was in sixth grade and their Dad had left for a second time and last time._

"_Shhh. Timmy it'll be okay. Shhh… there, there now."_

_After a few minutes the phone rang, it was Jason. Billy put him on hold and got Tim a glass of water, when he brought the water to Tim and telling him Jason was on the phone. The sobbing started all over and as he howled,_

"_Take a message, "_

_Billy held his hands up as a means of surrender,_

"_Okay."_

_Tim watches his brother as he walks back to the kitchen with the phone. He watches Billy talk for a few minutes. By now the shock has worn off and the sobs died down to silent tears pouring down rosy cheeks covered in stringy hair._

'_How am I going to tell him…'_

_He was so caught up in his thoughts he forgot about Billy, so when he walked back over and crouched down in front of him it scared him._

_Billy put a supportive hand on his shoulder, Tim and he may rarely see eye to eye on anything, but he knew he cared for him._

"_Jason said he'll be here in an hour, and to get ready for some great news."_

_Tim nodded, he didn't move from his seat on the floor. He just stared ahead at the wall._

***

(Present Day)

As usual he is so caught up in memories from the past; he loses sight of the present. As Tim is still staring out the window massaging away the contraction thoughtfully, he remembers what he had seen the night before:

(Last Night)

_Tim is rarely able to get comfortable most nights as of late, the cramping begins every night, it's mild but it's hard to get any rest. So he tries pacing for a while, if that doesn't work, he gets into the truck and goes for night drives. This particular night she is being particularly stubborn. Finally after a few minutes his daughter calms, massaging the swell, he speaks to her._

"_It's okay sweetheart. I know you're ready to come out but it's not time, just a little longer, okay?"_

_He pulls into the Garrity's subdivision, knowing it's roads wind and happens to be one of the larger subdivisions in Dillon. Humming to his daughter his hand rested at the apex of his stomach. He drives around the corner driving past Lyla's to see Jason and Lyla kissing. She was crying and hugging him. Jason caresses Lyla's cheek like he once did his. Tim stopped in the middle of the road in horror; Jason looked over at him and without even a look of remorse or guilt kissed her again, passionately. Tim stared the pain building in his chest as his body begins to wrack with sobs, he sped off. _

_Jason hadn't come to see him once since he had left, now he knows why. Tim knew in his heart, he had nothing to offer Jason. Truly what kind of competition could a drunken, white trash loser, whore like Tim Riggins be compared to the perfect, white collar and wonderful Saint Miss Lyla Garrity?_


	2. Chapter 2: Truth Revealed

With or Without you

_By: Kurenai LeStrange_

_**Friday Night Lights**_

_AU/Mpreg/Angst/Hurt_

_**Tim Riggins/Jason Street**_

_Rated: M_

_Disclaimer: I do not own any rights or properties to this series. I just manipulate the characters for your enjoyment. This is an Mpreg if you don't like it, don't read it. Thx! –Management. LOL._

_*_**What happens after a drunken one night stand turns into a life changing event? Who's life will change while their heart breaks and who's going to pretend it never happened? **

_Chapter 2: Truth Revealed_

_***_

_Truly what kind of competition could a drunken, white trash loser, whore like Tim Riggins be compared to the perfect, white collar and wonderful Saint Miss Lyla Garrity?_

'No regrets, right Riggins?' He asks himself glumly_, _lost in his thoughts. Billy is always able to sneak up on him as usual,

"You look like shit."

"Thanks," Tim says in response, while nearly jumping out of his chair in the process.

"By the way, do you think you announce yourself from now on? It's not good to scare me like that. It's not good for the baby or my heart."

Billy just laughs in response, then walks over to his younger brother, placing a hand on his shoulder, looking him over. He was shirtless as usual, he said he had grown tired of looking like a stuffed sausage in the shirts he had. They were like second skin on him. His typical golden glow has faded to a paled ash, he didn't look well. The bags under his eyes didn't help his looks either. It was getting harder and harder for him to get comfortable; pregnancy was not something his body did well. He sighed loudly as he generously rubbed the top of his belly. Billy crouched down in front of him so he could see his face.

"Tim?"

Tim's hair has gotten so long the light brown strands flow down his neck pooling at the base of his shoulders, his bangs down to his chin now. They hide his face well, when he wants them to. Billy reached up lifting his brother's chin, the tears now evident in the golden rays flowing through the window into the pale green nursery. His eyes were closed, and he was biting his lip in order to keep from crying out. He seemed to be holding his breath.

"Tim?"

Nothing.

"Contraction?"

Tim nodded gently. Billy reaches out to feel the normally soft mound under his hand; he could feel the muscles contracting under Tim's flesh.

He breathed out finally. He begins gently massaging the taunt flesh, taking soft deep breaths, his eyes closed. After a few moments Billy watches his eyes flutter open, his brothers dark lashes clumped together from the tears.

"Do I need to get the stopwatch?"

"No-", his deep voice softer than normal.

"No, I'm okay." He lied through his teeth.

Billy knew when to call bullshit on his brother.

Tim wanted to scream, 'I want Jason! I don't want to be alone! I can't have a baby by myself!'

As if he were reading Tim's mind,

"You need to tell him, Tim. He needs to know what he's done."

Tim looks up at him the shock evident on his face, but it was short-lived before it was crestfallen again. Billy knew depression could be a side-effect from pregnancy, but Tim has cried everyday for the last six months. He is beginning to worry. Tim finally whispers a response.

"No Billy, he deserves to have a normal life, he doesn't need a fuck-up like me ruining his plans. He deserves happiness, and this is the only way. I've already ruined my chances for the scholarships in football this season; I missed the play-offs and everything. I'll be lucky if the coach would let a quitter like me back on the team this coming season. I can't ruin things for Jason too! As far as this whole town sees us, we're just white trash, why would I let them know they're right. When they see me, I'm nothing more than a drunken whore, who quits everything and lets everyone down, that's how they see me. They Jason as some kind of hero, I can't tarnish that for him. Besides, he found everything he needs in Garrity."

Finally the truth, Billy is heartbroken when he finds out that is the only way Tim sees himself as a: a failure, a fuck-up, a quitter and a whore.

"Oh stop this bullshit, Tim, you know better than that. You'll be back and better than ever by spring training, so quit dwelling okay?"

"Yeah. Sure."

"And what's this about Lyla Garrity?"

"I caught Jason kissing Saint Garrity last night in her driveway…"

"First of all, what were you doing out of the house, and secondly did you let him know you saw?"

"I couldn't sleep, she was very active last night and car rides help calm her somehow, I do it a lot at night. And yes, he saw me. He showed no remorse while he stared me down kissing her as passionately as he could. Sides' you haven't noticed he isn't exactly going out of his way to knock down my door to see me."

Tim's breathe hitches, the last thing Billy wants to do is upset him more. He hugs his brother close,

"It'll be okay, alright? You're a great guy and you're going to be an even greater…father. You'll see things will have a way of working themselves out."

But though he was pale and thin to be pregnant, he hadn't lost much of his musculature. Billy was always jealous of the fact Tim got all the looks and the body to boot. Pregnant or not, he still had it and Jason's a fool for giving it up. He smiles at Tim who is trying to find the answers Billy found within him. He looks up to Billy, he tries his best to conjure up a winning smile. That smile soon fades when they hear the knocking on their front door. Tim hopes it isn't for him.

He hasn't had a visitor in the last four months he has been gone from school except one Mrs. Taylor. He thinks it's mainly because he told everyone there he hated them before he left. Which wasn't even close to the truth but he knew had to distance himself as much as possible. Mrs. Taylor made monthly visits, to check on his mystery condition and drop off his school work, and pick up what he had completed. On some visits she stays to chat about the team, or what new things were going on at school. He often cherished her company, though he would never admit it.

Billy yells for them to hang on as he gets up, Tim grabs his arm,

"Billy, mind helping me back to bed, I need to lie down. Please."

Billy smiles and holds out his hand for Tim to take, he pulls himself up, belly first as Billy has been joking with him. As usual Billy laughs while his brother waddles alongside him. Tim wraps his free arm under the circumference to offer himself support as he walks.

"What's so funny, Bill?"

Tim is serious.

"Nothing bro. Nothing. I'm going to see who's at the door then make you a sandwich. That little one needs food as badly as you do."

He lifts Tim's legs onto the bed, then covers his sweatpants clad lower half in the blankets.

"Thanks Billy."

"No problem. That's my niece you know. "

Tim smiles, he looks to the right of his bed, to the nightstand and picks up the small frame with the digital ultrasound he had done two days ago. He looked at his beautiful daughter, well, his and Jason's. He rubs his thumb across the glass as if he could actually stroke her cheek. He feels a single tear roll down his cheek; he wipes it away with the back of his hand.

Hearing footsteps coming up the hallway, Tim begins to panic knowing he does indeed have a visitor. Actually, multiple visitors, from the sound of the hushed tones and shuffled footsteps. His door is slightly ajar, so Tim can make out the shadows of at least three people; he pulls the blankets up under his arms. He looks down knowing there is a full visual of his silhouette, and he knows there is no way they wouldn't be able to tell of his condition. He begins to panic, looking around frantically while his brother Billy seems to be stalling them. Tim tries to listen in while he pushes more pillows behind himself to sit up more, then draws his knees close. He nods in satisfaction, when he sees his bump has been properly camouflaged.

He receives a kick of protest from his daughter, causing his breath to hitch lightly. She is much happier when he is lying down, so she has more room to be. He places his hand back on the top of his stomach; she seems to remain calm as long as it's there and he knew he needs the reassurance.

"It's okay sweetheart, Daddy's here." He whispers.


	3. Chapter 3: Secrets Uncovered

**With or Without you**

_By: __**Kurenai LeStrange**_

_**Friday Night Lights: Tim Riggins/Jason Street**_

_AU/Mpreg/Angst/Hurt_

_Rated: M_

_Disclaimer: I do not own any rights or properties to this series. I just manipulate the characters for your enjoyment. This is an Mpreg if you don't like it, don't read it. Thx! –Management. LOL._

_*_**What happens after a drunken one night stand turns into a life changing event? Who's life will change while their heart breaks and who's going to pretend it never happened?**

Chapter 3: Secret's Uncovered

"It's okay sweetheart, Daddy's here." He whispers.

There's a light knock at the door and Tim looks up, seeing Coach standing there with Saracen and of all people Smash Williams. He is hoping to God they didn't see or hear what he'd just done. He clears his throat nervously.

"Hi guys, what brings to my neck of the woods?"

Smash steps forward,

"I think you know why, we're here, Riggs."

Tim goes rigid for a moment as his ribs are struck by a tiny foot; he prays his wince isn't too noticeable. He clears his throat again.

"Nope, actually, I don't Smash."

His voice cracking a bit as Coach steps forward,

"Well, Son. No one has heard from you in the last few months, and we-"

Smash pushes past the coach.

"_Need somebody to protect my ass! We need that to score some more points. Besides, we know the truth…"_

Tim swallows hard,

"_T-Truth? What's that two zero?"_

"_You don't hate us; I know you and I had some moments in the beginning, but it's all good now baby. You can't hide from us forever."_

"_Y-Yeah."_

Saracen chimes in. Tim sighs in relief. Smash smiles at him genuinely,

"_Besides if you don't come back, Saracen's gonna end up dead. You gotta come back."_

"_Well I'm sorry that's jus' not possible right now."_

"_Whatever, Riggs. You can't just lie around here and get drunk the forever, baby. It's just not good for ya!"_

Smash gets closer to the bed, Riggins tenses up.

"_Come on man, quit playin' sick, let's go play some football."_

"_Smash, no!"_

Riggins shouts as Smash grabs the cover's out of his hands, revealing his body and his secret to them, the picture of the ultrasound crashing to the floor at Coach Taylor's feet. Tim bites his bottom lip, fighting the tears and the embarrassment; he looks away quickly, but can only keep them at bay for a moment. As the tears roll down his flushed cheeks, the boys stand there, shocked.

They didn't know what is more shocking; the change in his appearance or the fact that Big Tim Riggins is crying. Picking up the frame containing the ultrasound, Coach Taylor doesn't miss a beat, he walks up to Tim, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.

"_Hey son, it's okay. You're doing the right thing. I'm proud of you, with or without you on the field. I just wished you had of come to me for help or advice, Okay?"_

Coach wipes the silent tears away with his coat sleeve, nodding his head Tim looks up at the coach in shock. The coach releases him from his grip, then places his hand on Tim's belly,

"_Wow another little panther, huh? Is it a boy or a girl, son?"_

"_A girl."_

With that Smash was out like a light sprawled across the hard woods. Saracen just stood back in shock and awe. Coach Taylor looks over at Smash, and then looks back to Tim running his hand across the taunt flesh.

"_Well, looks like you're getting close, you okay?"_

"_Yeah, except it's hard to breathe most of the time; she kicks my diaphragm a lot." He replies softly, hardly believing he is talking to Coach about his daughter._

"_You on bedrest?"_

"_Yes sir."_

"_Why son?"_

"_The doctor told me between school, football, my personal life and various strained relationships, my stress level is too high. I've almost lost her twice."_

Coach nods, looking down upon the boy he had grown to love like a son, fondly known as Riggs or thirty-three. He pulls the covers back up which Riggs pulls in closely to his body trying to hide his embarrassment. His cheek burning in shame.

'_He is so pale,' _the coach thought.

Tim could feel the beads of sweat forming on his brow, the blackened bags under his eyes stated his level of exhaustion. His chiseled jaw line is set and his breathing ragged, he knows the question, 'Who is the father?' is looming overhead.

His golden brown hair, hangs in strings around his face, where the combination of tears and sweat have built up. Upon Tim's massive frame, set feminine features, so dainty, yet fearsome. Tim, is a large boy, standing at six' one" and two hundred plus pounds now, of pure muscle, so the distended abdomen, in which his hands kept a constant vigil on is almost comical when compared to the rest of his perfect body. Lying before Coach Taylor's eyes is one of the most formidable fullbacks in all of Texas, very pregnant, scared and alone. Coach takes a step back when he is approached by Saracen, forgetting he was with him.

"_Can I talk to him for a moment in private, Coach? I drug Smash out to the couch, I think he might have a concussion."_

"_Sure Matt, I'll go check on Smash."_

Riggs looks to Matt fearful of what he wants to talk about. Matt takes a seat next to him on the queen size bed. Riggs leans a little further into the pillows, to put a little more space between him and Saracen. Awkward as usual, Matt greets him,

"_H-Hey Riggs."_

Tim nods back. Suddenly Matt closes all the space that was in between them in seconds and startles Riggs by pulling him close in a hug. Tim fought back for a moment releasing a strangled cry. Saracen begins to retreat quickly but at the last second Riggs grasps him back, so Matt pulls him close again.

"_Sorry. Why are you hugging me?"_

"_I was watching you, while Coach was talking. You looked like you could use a hug. Or some kind human interaction or something. Sorry. I know you don't like people in your space."_

Riggs held him close, fighting the tears saturating his eyes.

"_Thank you."_

He choked out, taking the much smaller boy's embrace into him. Suddenly in all his embarrassment, Tim began sobbing into the letter jacket collar of QB1. He was so tired of crying, so tired of having no one to confide in. He figured the team had forgotten about him, since he hadn't gone to any of the parties over the summer. Instead he had stayed home, bed ridden for most of the summer, growing into something he would best describe as a small planet.

"_So is this where you'd been hiding all summer?"_

Tim nods as he weeps; Matt covers his mouth with one of his hands.

"_You've been here by yourself all summer?"_

Tim nods again, as he tries breathing to calm himself,

"_Street hasn't even come to keep you company?"_

"_No, he's in Austin working." Tim whispers,_

"_No he's here; he's been back and forth for the last three months. He's here for at least a week at a time. Last night he asked, Lyla to marry him outside her house."_

"_For the last three months…"_

Tim stares at Matt like he's an alien,

"_Engaged. No, he would tell me if…"_

"_It happened; Lyla called Julie this morning and gave her the details."_

Tim looked blankly at the bed silent tears spilling from reddened eyes. He could barely contain his emotions, apparently his emotional state has a direct link to his daughter, because she is kicking the hell out of him. He hisses as the kicks get worse, rubbing a sore spot next to his rib. Matt stands quickly,

"_Do you need a doctor, are you okay? I just saw it move."_

Tim shakes his head as he breathes deeply, placing a hand on his stomach, as he uses the others to wipe his eyes.

"'_It' is a, she. And sit down I'm fine. She's kicking; you see her moving because she's pretty much out of room to grow."_

Matt gives Tim a sideways glance as he takes his seat next to him again. Still looking like he is ready to bolt at any second.

"_Does it hurt?"_

"_Yeah, I'd say so."_

"_How bad?"_

"_You know what it feels like to be sacked…"_

"_Yeah,"_

"_Feels about like that except for it's your organs' taking the hit."_

Matt grimaces.

"_Yeah, I know."_

Tim says, being cut off by an involuntary pant. Matt looks as though he is about to book it. Tim smiles tiredly.

"_Give me your hand Saracen."_

"_Um… no, I'm okay, really."_

"_I might be pregnant but I can still kick your scrawny ass, Seven."_

"_Yeah."_

Matt saw the look crossing Riggs' features that told him not to argue with an upset and pregnant teammate, so he quickly put his hand out for Riggs to grasp. He takes Saracen's hand in his and places it near the top of his left side. They wait, Saracen opens his mouth to speak, and Tim cuts him off.

"_Shh, just watch and be patient."_


	4. Chapter 4: Not a Request

**With or Without you**

_By: __**Kurenai LeStrange**_

_**Friday Night Lights: Tim Riggins/Jason Street**_

_AU/Mpreg/Angst/Hurt/Comfort_

_Rated: M_

_Disclaimer: I do not own any rights or properties to this series. I just manipulate the characters for your enjoyment. This is an Mpreg if you don't like it, don't read it. Thx! –Management. LOL._

**What happens after a drunken one night stand turns into a life changing event? Whose life will change while their heart breaks and who's going to pretend it never happened?**

**Chapter 4: Not a Request**

*******

"_Give me your hand Saracen."_

"_Um… no, I'm okay, really."_

"_I might be pregnant but I can still kick your scrawny ass, Seven."_

"_Yeah."_

Matt could see by the look crossing Riggs' features that told him not to argue with an upset and pregnant teammate, so he quickly put his hand out for Riggs to grasp. He takes Saracen's hand in his and places it near the top of his left side. They wait, Saracen opens his mouth to speak, and Tim cuts him off.

"_Shh, just watch and be patient."_

Tim takes Saracen's hand in his and places it near the top of his left side of the swell. As they wait, Saracen opens his mouth to speak, and Tim cuts him off.

"_Shh, just watch and be patient."_

Tim pushes his hand a little harder against the swollen flesh, and then suddenly Matt yelps happily when his hand is kicked. He puts his hand back to see if it would happen again.

"_That is awesome."_

"_Yeah, at least for one of us."_

Tim says cynically. He hears the shuffling of small feet and large ones on the hardwood floor making their way to his room. Tim looks at the clock, it's six p.m.

"_Right on time."_

He states as Bo comes running around the corner into his room, Coach not far behind. Matt stands up out of the way.

"_Hey, Tim Riggins!"_

"_Hey, Bo Miller."_

He runs to the left side of the bed, which is still unclaimed by anyone and tries to climb up. Tim grabs his arm and pulls him up to the top. The small, blonde ball of energy wiggles his way next to Tim sitting directly under his left arm and leans against him. Coach moves to stand at the foot of the bed. Bo getting more excited by the moment sitting next to Tim, he pushes himself onto his knees so he can see Tim.

"_Is she awake tonight?"_

"_Why, yes she is buddy."_

"_Awesome, can I feel?"_

"_Of course!"_

Bo puts his hand out and Tim taking the much smaller hand in his, places it next to the sore spot near his ribs pushing it down and then across the surface. Nothing happens, so he does it again, this time leaving Bo's hand where it stops. His small hand is pummeled by a series of kicks that leaves Tim nearly gasping for air. Bo's excitement is expressed in the form of an excited shriek of laughter.

"_That is so cool."_

Tim smiles down at his little friend, tousling through Bo's blonde scruff.

"_Yep. Sure is." _

He replies breathily.

"I can't stay tonight; Mom wants me to go to bed early, so I can spend the afternoon with you tomorrow. It's Saturday, remember and Mom has to work."

"_So it is, little friend."_

Bo springs to his knees, hugging Tim's neck for a minute.

"_I love you, Tim Riggins!"_

He crawls down from the bed.

"_I love you, too Bo Miller!"_

"_Want me to bring 'Back to the Future' over again?"_

"_That'll be great, buddy!"_

Bo gives him one last crooked smile, and then runs out the door; Matt follows to let him out. Tim looks back from the doorway when Coach clears his throat. Tim looks at him, and then quickly looks down, cheeks burning with embarrassment as he pulls the comforter back over his swollen, bare midsection.

"_Tim."_

"_Yeah, Coach."_

"_I know your brother is going to out of town for the next three weeks because of Real Estate school, so he's asked me to take you under my watchful eye. You getting ready to enter your eighth month, your body is going to be undergoing a lot of changes and discomforts over the next few weeks. So I think it would be best you stay with us in our spare room."_

"_But Coach, I-" _

_Tim protests, but Eric holds his hand up to silence him._

"_I've arranged it so that, Bo comes to my house to see you from now on. He is welcome to come over and stay anytime for any length of time needed. Tami is there at all hours with the baby, so there will be someone there all the time."_

"_But I'm fine here by-"_

"_Yourself. I know but Tim what happens if you go into labor and you're here by yourself? God forbid there be something wrong with you or the baby. What would you do, if you went into labor, son? What then Tim, I couldn't live with myself if something were to happen to you and I could have helped."_

Tim sat there in silence, in complete surprise someone cared about him so much. He let the silent tears roll down his cheeks. Coach sat next to him and placed a hand over the portion of comforter hiding the bulbous outline, his eyes welling up for this boy in so much emotional pain.

"_Son, you don't know what to expect when you're expecting. No matter how many times you do it, things change, things happen. It's especially hard-"_

Coach clears his throat, hoping the boulder forming there would move, his voice cracking.

"_It's especially hard if you're doing it by yourself, son. My family and I have grown very fond of you and want to help. This is not a request. I will be back in an hour to help you pack and then we'll head home for dinner, okay?"_

Tim's face looks crestfallen, biting his lip his looks up from the comforter.

"_Okay, Coach,"_

Tim replies softly, letting the salty tears slide down his cheeks.

"_Now lie down and rest. I've already sent Billy on his way. I'm going to drop the boys off then I'll be back to help you dress, pack and then we'll go."_

As Tim turns to lie down, he remembered something important and embarrassing,

"_Um... Coach."_

"_Yes, Son."_

"_I have a confession."_

"_Yeah."_

"_I don't really have any clothes that fit."_

"_Okay, that's fine. I will see you shortly."_

Coach helps Matt carry a still very unconscious Smash to the car. Tim listens as he hears them pull away from his house. He lies back carefully rolling to his side, rubbing gentle circles, humming to his daughter.

"_Can you believe it, Billy was right, sweetheart. Things might actually work out."_

And with that he fell asleep smiling, for the first time in months.

***


	5. Chapter 5: Burning Dinner

**With or Without you**

_By: __**Kurenai LeStrange**_

_**Friday Night Lights: Tim Riggins/Jason Street**_

_AU/Mpreg/Angst/Hurt_

_Rated: M_

_Disclaimer: I do not own any rights or properties to this series. I just manipulate the characters for your enjoyment. This is an Mpreg if you don't like it, don't read it. Thx! –Management. LOL._

_*_**What happens after a drunken one night stand turns into a life changing event? Who's life will change while their heart breaks and who's going to pretend it never happened?**

**Chapter 5: Burning Dinner**

Coach helps Matt carry a still unconscious Smash to the car. Tim listens as he hears them pull away from his house. He is lying on his side, rubbing gentle circles, humming to his daughter.

"_Can you believe it, Billy was right sweetheart. Things might actually work out."_

And with that he fell asleep smiling, for the first time in months.

After Coach leaves Riggs' house and drops off the boys, he head's straight to Target. Grabbing a buggy, he knows he's on a mission and is pressed for time. Heading straight for the men's department he passes all the dress clothes and heads straight for the work section. He knew that's where he could find the plaid and flannel section, grabbing two, button-down plaid shirts in a size Large, he throws one in the buggy holding the other up to himself in the mirror. He couldn't tell if that where big enough, so he takes it off the hanger putting it on over his Blue Panthers polo shirt. Buttoning the buttons he pulls the base out to see how far it extended from his waist.

"_Not going to be big enough for long…"_

He says to himself, nearly jumping out of his skin when someone clears their throat behind him.

"_Planning on gaining some weight buddy?"_

Eric spins around to see his assistant Mac McGill behind him, watching him questioningly.

"_Hahahaha. Yeah, Mac. Tami's been taking some cooking classes and those second helpings are starting to catch up."_

"_Well, you're gonna have to tell me where she's going for them, because I need to send Susan. Thirty years married and she still burns the casserole."_

Eric laughs quickly as he grabs three more plaids in different colors in an Extra Large and throws them in the buggy as well as the one he tried on.

"_Yeah, I'll try to remember to ask her. See ya around Mac."_

"_See you Monday Coach."_

He quickly makes his way over to the underwear section and grabs two packs of briefs in Large and a pack of boxers tossing them into the cart. His phone rings as he makes his way to the sock section, looking down.

'_Tami'_

He begins to panic.

'_Shit. Guess I better tell her.'_

"_Tami, sweetie. What are you doing?"_

"_Feeding Gracie, wondering why my loving husband isn't home yet or why he hasn't at least called."_

"_Sorry, hun. But uh, a bit of a situation has come up with one of the players and I'm trying to help."_

"_Who?"_

"_Riggins."_

"_I know. He's been put on bed rest because of Mono. I deliver his schoolwork once a week. What's wrong? Has he been faking it?"_

"_No, not exactly it's definitely not mono."_

"_What do you mean not exactly Mono? Are you saying, he's been faking it, and has run off to Mexico again?"_

"_No, but it's something I can't exactly talk about over the phone. Just be ready to go with me to pick him up in twenty minutes. Okay?"_

"_Pick him up? Eric, I'm in the middle of cooking dinner."_

"_Well have Julie watch it and Gracie for a few. I have a feeling he's really going to need someone to talk to on the way to the house and I'm no good at this sort of thing. I made him cry earlier."_

"_Cry? Eric what's' going on? Where are we taking him?"_

"_He's going to be staying with us for a while. Just be ready in twenty, I'll tell you everything in the car."_

"_Fine! I'll just burn dinner. Happy?"_

She shouts as she slams down the receiver. He grabs a pack of socks then throws them in the buggy, then grabs two packs of extra large undershirts and angrily chunks them in afterward.

"_Fine."_

He mutters under his breath, mockingly, shoving the phone back in his pocket. He made his way to the pajama section, he grabs the comfiest looking robe he could find then throws it in the buggy, and he turns to go to the next aisle stopping in his tracks. He thinks for a moment, smiles, and then rushes back over to find one of the same robes in his own size.

'_Might as well get myself a gift for being so nice.'_

He throws the second robe in then wanders over to the workout clothes. Knowing that's probably the last thing on Riggins mind right now, he turns to walk away and thought quickly,

'_What's more comfortable then sweatpants?'_

He grabs three pair of large and also in extra large throwing them in the buggy he tries to think of what else he might need.

'_Tooth brush and tooth paste, deodorant, a brush… psssft! A brush? What am I thinking? Jus' cause he's pregnant doesn't mean he'll actually start brushing his hair. Now what else does he need… oh yeah, face wash, pre-natal vitamins. That should cover the basics, right?'_

He gathers the rest of his items, throwing them in the buggy he quickly heads for checkout. As he piles everything onto the conveyor belt the girl behind the counter smiles at him awkwardly.

"_Hi."_

He says then continues to pile the clothes onto the conveyor. He pulls the buggy up, loads it up then pays.

"_Thanks for shopping at Target!"_

He smiles,

"You have yourself a nice night,"

He then bolts out the door for his Ford.


	6. Chapter 6: Conception

**With or Without you**

**_By: __Kurenai LeStrange_**

_**Friday Night Lights: Tim Riggins/Jason Street**_

_AU/Mpreg/Angst/Hurt_

_Rated: M_

_Disclaimer: I do not own any rights or properties to this series. I just manipulate the characters for your enjoyment. This is an Mpreg if you don't like it, don't read it. Thx! –Management. LOL._

* * *

**Chapter 6: Conception**

Eric Taylor smiles,

_"You have yourself a nice night."_

_"Thanks for shopping at Target!"_

The girl says smiling back awkwardly. He then bolts out the door for his Ford.

Tim sits in the rocking chair, trying to remember the night she was conceived on week trip to Mexico. Jason was saddened because of the disappointment over trying and being unable to have a risky spinal surgery.

_And that 10,000 dollar pyramid is the only thing they play on repeat and it's in Spanish, but there was plenty of money, booze and lack of women. Riggins can barely contain his boredom and watching his friend's self-loathing wasn't helping things either._

"_What are we watching right now, six? For the past week?"_

"_We're watching the Ten Thousand Dollar Pyramid in Spanish"_

"_We have a bag of money; we're in Mexico for a week now. A bag of money, Booze, No women. No stories, No Memories."_

"_Well, guess what, Riggs? You should've thought about all that before you jumped in a truck and came down to Mexico with me."_

_Riggs angrily takes a chug of his beer as he listens to Jason in disbelief._

"_I'm down here for one reason. That's to see a doctor. This bag is not a bag of memories; it's a bag of ten thousand dollars for said doctor. Okay?"_

_Riggs can barely grasp what his best friends is saying, his heart burns with a new ache as he hears the distress in his best friends' voice. He is inwardly fighting, getting up and sitting next to Jason and taking him in his arms, kissing him and then telling him everything would be okay. Because Riggins knew if he could get Jason in his arms, everything would be okay, for him at least. But he knew as well as everyone, Jason only swung one way._

"_So, until I see said doctor, we're not going anywhere and neither is the money."_

_Riggins has fought it all he can he has to at least touch Jason, be close to him. He propels himself off the bed._

"_Yeah you are. I don't even need that. Let's go."_

_Riggins grabs Jason's legs,_

"_Riggins, don't touch me"_

"_We're going out!"_

"_Riggins do not touch me"_

"_We're going out! No regrets, Six! None."_

"_Riggins! Stop!"_

_At this point he had Jason up out of the bed and nearly slung over his shoulder._

"_Stop! Ah!"_

_They get a little more than they ask for when Riggins is for arrested for trying to bribe a police officer so they can drink. Tim knew he was pissed when he saw the look in his eyes, especially when he told Street,_

"_It took you long enough to get me out."_

"_This is my surgery money, Tim. Not your bail money."_

_What he wouldn't do to be able to see him make that same look at him all the time. So sexy, and the fire…. Ahhh! He had to ease it over,_

"_I'm heading back to the hotel!" Jason yells angrily,_

"_Would you at least buy me a few tacos first?"_

_Jason laughed at Riggs' reply; they walked chatting about what happens in a Mexican jail. They stop and get a few cocktails then head to the back of the bar to do some Spanish Karaoke._

_As they're heading back to the room, Jason's wheel gets caught in the crevice of the sidewalk. Tim's trying to help him but they're both pretty buzzed still. He crouches down real low, and puts all his weight into pulling the wheel up, when he does get it free it ends up throwing him onto his back. They are both laughing so hard, that when Jason puts a hand out to pull Tim up, forgetting to lock his wheels, he's pulled out of his chair landing in Tim's strong lap and arms. _

_They laugh for a few seconds longer, but something changes, perhaps it was the mischievous glimmer in Riggins hazel eyes. Or maybe it was the look of complete adoration in Jason's blue ones but a look begins, followed by a touch, and that was followed with a kiss. A kiss that lasts so long, that the two men were left completely breathless, leaning into each other, tasting each other from the other's lips. Riggins allows a single tear to slip down his cheek in the pale streetlight._

"_Tim, what's wrong?"_

_Through cloudy eyes, brimming with tears, Tim looks Jason directly in the eyes, _

"_Jason, you don't know how long I have wanted to do that."_

_Jason bit his lip, staring into Tim's eyes for what felt like the first time. He kissed the tears from Riggs' eyes, and stroked his cheek; he knew he could finally come to terms with his true feelings for Riggs. "You don't know how long I've wanted you to do that."_

_Jason looks at his watch and Tim helps him up and back into the chair. Now instead of walking beside him, he is walking behind pushing his chair with his arms wrapped around Jason. They got back to the room and Tim moves the nightstand so he can push the twin beds together. They have a big day ahead of them tomorrow. Riggs picks Jason up and places him in the center of the bed, helping him remove his jacket and gloves, his shirt then his shoes and pants. Tim heads into the bathroom, when he comes out he sees Jason naked and propped up on his elbows lying on the center of the bed,_

"_So Tim, you wanna make some memories?"_

_TBC…_


	7. Chapter 7:Nai needs your help, Readers!

Dear Faithful and Wonderful Readers of My Story,

I am terribly sorry for the wait on the next chapter, my writers block has been incredible. I can't seem to find my way around it and I desperately want to reward your patience. With 8 stories in the works (most the upcoming chapters are complete but do not begin for another two chapters) and 4 new stories yet to be posted, I have wanted to update this story asap to get you the chapters I've already completed. The only thing is, I want the joining chapters to be terrific, no filler or fluff to patch in the new completed work for this story... so that is where you guys come in.

I would be honored if any or all of you sent me a private message with what you would like to see happen next between the characters or what direction you would take the story next. I excited and intrigued to see what ideas you guys have and which one will ignite the spark I need to begin a writers fire!

Please write the story name your ideas are for in the subject area and then put your ideas. Please feel free to leave a critique with it. I always love hearing about why you like the story and what it is about the characters you love so much! I will begin checking my inbox in the next hour and hope to have something up before the new year, so keep your eyes peeled for new chapter! I will announce the name/s of the readers who help me kick this writers block at the end of the new chapter.

Thank you so much for your time and patience, I love all my readers and thank you again for your help!

-xoxo,

Nai-Chan


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